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Brad Belt: Music-5pp

I Don't Look Good Naked Anymore (comedy)

(Brad Belt)
I Don’t Look Good Naked Anymore

© 2003 Brad Belt

All modesty aside
There once was a time
When undressing was a thing I liked to do
In the mirror when I’d see
A full length view of me
Well I’d just feel obliged to salute
Shoulders wide and hips narrow
When I’d take away the apparel
My wife would sometimes faint from sheer delight
Yeah I was a treasure
By any woman’s measure
An absolute pleasure in the night
But there is no way to stop
That damn ticking clock
No way to have known what was in store
What was once a source of pride
Is now a sight to be denied
I don’t look good naked anymore
Chorus: I don’t look good naked anymore
It’s not a pretty sight
When my briefs fall to the floor
I see my image and I sigh
It makes me want to cry
I don’t look good naked anymore
I realize with despair
That with my thinning hair
The rest of me has gotten big and round
What I eat and drink
Would make a sailor blink
I guess I’ve become what I’ve downed
Me and wifey snuggle
We hug and we cuddle
Expecting Mr. Johnson to be a peepin’
But expect as we might
It’s the same old sight
He apparently prefers to be a sleepin’
If I wasn’t such a mizer
I’d call on Mr. Pfizer
See if that Viagra stuff would work
But at $20 bucks a pill
I don’t think I will
After all he’s always been a jerk